Taking a little R&R

Sorry for the delay in my weekly updates but I was in the US for the past several weeks to visit with friends and family in both Washington DC and St Louis, Missouri. Since this was essentially my first time out of the Balkans in the past 8 months it was a much needed and appreciated break. Although there was a flurry of activity to keep me busy non-stop, upon reflection most of it seems trivial to report on. It was much more a visit about being rather than doing even though there was some doing just to be. It was so nice to just spend time catching up with people from my past who know me well enough that we were just able to pick up where we left off and share about the challenges of my assignment in Kosovo, questions about the future and to hear about their lives. As most of you will agree (and I am learning the older I get), it isn't as much about where you are as it is who you are with. And I am so blessed to have some of the best friends and family on the planet!

I must admit that things in the US seemed a bit cleaner, brighter, more organized, happy and healthy than when I left. Compared to Kovoso, I couldn't get over how beautiful both DC and StL looked with all the open green space, flowers in bloom, trashless streets and actual sidewalks to walk on. Public transit was everywhere (even rode the metro in StL for the first time ever) and I was bored out of my mind driving since the streets were straight with painted lines, proper intersections with stop signs or lights and people who obeyed the rules of the road or the law and didn't cut you off every two minutes. DC has become smoke-free and I couldn't get enough of sniffing the fresh air every chance I remembered. It is amazing how the little things can become big things (especially since I have virtually stopped going out in Kosovo due to the insane amount of smoke).

Well, the adventures began with a 20 hour layover in London which afforded me one very very late night with a best friend from New Zealand who I get to see maybe once a year. John and I connect on so many levels which considering that we both met while hiking the ridge of a volcano in Indonesia in 1998 shouldn't surprise me. After recovering from following the exact opposite directions on how to get to his place (yes, John gave them to me;-) I deposited my (heavy) bag at his flat in downtown London before the two of us and one other Kiwi mate hit numerous pubs and clubs kicking back way too many beers followed by shots. Not sure if this was a London, Kiwi, or John thing but no matter it kicked my ass and took the next 5-6 days of vacation to slowly catch up on the missed sleep and intensive hang-over. I guess my benefit to drinking allot is not being able to sleep much so I was up and about relatively early the next day to meet another dear friend of mine who I also met during my southeast Asian tour in 1998. Vicky and I are able to reconnect every several years and we enjoyed my first proper English breakfast in many months while catching up on old times.



So onto DC where I arrived without incident and with plenty of time (or so I thought) to make it into the city, track down my friends apt. key and be waiting for my best friend from grad school who took a train in just to see me for one night and day before she had to return to NY. For anyone who has had to endure the pains of Dulles Airport, the main one is its ridiculous location way outside the city with no train or regular buses into DC. So resorting to Super shuttle for 1/3rd the price of a cab, I ended up waiting and waiting for that damn van to fill up. When we were finally in route the driver must have just moved to DC last week and was using then new navigation systems to tell him exactly how to get to each persons' destination. What the stupid computer didn't tell him is that you NEVER drive through Georgetown to the Adams Morgan Circle on a Sat night. We were in bumper to bumper traffic for so I long I got out of the van, hopped in a taxi to race over to some club where I found my friend to get the key and then arrive at the apartment just as Carol's taxi pulled up. Believe it or not this was all done without the convenience of a cell phone. The Serbian card I had would not work in the US and although I feared this would happen and had set up the logistics ahead of time, it was still a nightmare and made me wonder how we ever survived without cell phones.

Once connected with Carol we hit my old hood in DC for a late night meal (technically think it was breakfast for me) and enjoyed the first 'smoke-free' dining experience I have had (ever in DC since it just banned it) since being in the Balkans. Conversations continued well into the night till I finally fell asleep still talking back at my friends apartment (another advantage of having great friends also do the same line of work I do who are out of country to lend me their apartment, bike and car--you're the best Andrew!). Sunday was a full day of trying to OD on spirituality that I have been missing in Kosovo. Started the day off with the most perfect brunch of toasted banana, peanut butter and honey sandwich before Carol and I went to my old Unitarian church to hear the amazing choir and see my friends in the congregation. Followed by a baby reunion (first of many) to see another grad school friend, husband, and new baby Sam. Can't seem to get enough of kids these days...awe oh. As the most perfect day with Carol came to an end and she departed, I went to my meditation Sangha to see old friends and just settle into my present space of excitement and renewed connection. So nice. And if this wasn't enough my old Aussie mate (who I also met while in SE Asia) picked me up so we could head to the Georgetown Wharf for a late outside dinner on the pier to check out the local babe scene and catch-up. DC in the Springtime is hard to beat!

So my next 3 days in DC quickly cascaded into a collection of doctor appointments, 'business lunches', ODing on Starbucks, and meeting with more friends for some one on one time (even went to the zoo to see the famous Panda with my close friend Jen). One night my condo building held a BBQ for my visit back which was great so I could meet the second tenant of my apartment. I must admit it was very weird to walk back into my old home full of two ladies things. They have done a great job keeping the place in good condition and living in it gently. I was expecting more of a nostalgic feeling but there things just seemed to fit so well into the place I guess I couldn't really imagine it again with my things. The weather held out for us and my rooftop grill still kicked out some perfect (American) burgers and while we nursed some watered down American beer. Nice to feel still the family feeling from my neighbors and made me want to consider coming back there, someday. The neighborhood also looked fantastic with the roads newly paved, much of the construction complete and of course everything in bloom.

A highlight of the DC visit was spending most of one day lunching with my Aunt up in the burbs and then heading over to my 'nieces' house to play with 4 year Kate till her 8 year old sister came home from school and I had them till bedtime. From my 2 years living in DC I became very close to both of them and have really missed seeing them grow-up and being there to help support them. But we picked up right where we left off not wasting a minute to play butterfly out in the cardboard house, to make a caterpillar hotel, play on the swings, ride the bike and tricle to the school to play on the jungle gym. I had taught Sophia how to ride before I left and it was so great to see her master the bike now with no problems. We had a wonderful BBQ their mom made for us and we then worked on homework before finally putting the girls down to bed. Hard to release from their hugs and explain to them that I would come back again as soon as I could. 1 day a year just isn't enough, even if they are not my kids...





My final hurrah was one of my old hangout where any other friends I had not yet been able to see just stopped by for a hug and drink. A good showing, warm DC evening air, no smoking and many Chimay beers assured me of yet another late and limited sleeping night. No worries since I had planned the next nine days to just relax at my mom's house in St Louis with visits to my dad and my lil sis flying in from LA to hang out for a long weekend. I guess I shouldn't have been too surprised when my schedule there seemed just as packed.

Upon arriving in the town where I grew up (but haven't lived for 18 years), it is just amazing how everything goes on auto-pilot. You immediately remember where everything is since nothing seems to have really changed. Just now all seemed more orderly, clean, big, organized, sparsely populated and easy. Driving around in the rental I realized how spread out the city is but how quickly you can get from one place to the next with the 2-5 lane roads. It was very nice to see my mom again in high spirits and good health. She had recently purchased a condo and has really enjoyed converting it into a home. Seeing my various adventure pictures all over the place I really enjoyed her plush carpets and spotlessly clean rooms (now I know where I get it from) along with a fully stocked refrigerator with homemade brownies, one of my favorite breakfast cakes, cereals, and all other things American that I have subtly missed. I had notes all over reminding me of various doctor appointments, visits with friends and other engagements I had been committed to. Stacey, my sister also arrived that next day and straight from the airport with hit a local Italian place to have a very nice late meal and catch up on the last year that we hadn't seen one another. Just something to be said about going 'home', especially when one seems to travel so far away.




I also had plenty of quality time with dad which included a 2 day visit to a family friends farm. Although it rained most the time we were there it was still nice to take a long hike, play on the jeep and 4 wheeler and especially sitting out on the front porch reading or chatting with dad. I miss these real talks about nothing in particular. Just talking. Hard to do when communicating long distance since most of the communication is based on what everyone is doing rather than how we are feeling. I would have posted a great collection of photos from the farm but they got deleted at a camera store when I tried to print them. Oh well.



It was nice to have such an experienced shopper as my sister since I had a huge list of things I needed to stock up on that I just can't get in Kosovo. This included a new suitcase with wheels that I could actually put everything in. A very funny random collection of decaf coffee, tennis balls, Tibetan cymbals and books for my yoga teaching, new running shoes. We hit all the old malls and just enjoyed each others company as I added more and more to the credit card.




I also have two of the dearest and oldest friends still in StL who are priorities upon my return. Although times have changed from our days of hitting the bars and clubs to visiting with them, their lovely wives and 1 and 4 kids. I must admit their stories of family life and fatherhood have me as intrigued and amused as I am from many of my own emerging market adventures. I even had the chance to help get little Eric ready for bed and read him bedtime stories. I find both Sydney and Alex to be an inspiration and role model to what it means by having the white picket fence and 1.5 kids (well Alex went a bit overboard).





Even though my parents are separated they still are friends and the entire family spent one night over at dear friends house with 3 other couples whose kids were all about the same age of Stacey and I and the gang would always do Superbowl parties, weddings and other random get togethers to just laugh till our sides hurt while stuffing our faces with family cooking and strong drinks. Only one of the other kids was around but all the story sharing was enough to be thankful I was back for this special visit sharing it with my family.






On one other night I was able to relive my highschool days to the T. A close highschool buddy Mark was back in StL for the weekend and we made plans for me to stop by his house, see his girls, for us to take his fathers nice new sportcar convertible out, go cruising down in the 'artsie' district full of outdoor restaurants and bars while appreciating the local scenery, eating sushi and contrasting of how different our lives have become with one of us as a private equity trader and an emerging market development consultant. But yet we will always have StL together.





The visit couldn't be complete without seeing at least one baseball game in the new stadium where we cheered on the Cardinals to a terrible loss but had just the best seats, hotdogs and cheesie jumbotron cam shots and advertisements flying from every direction. Ah, the good ole red-neck StL trash combined with every other walk of life and diversity that Missouri has to offer. And then changing gears quickly after the game to catch an opening weekend performance of the new Spiderman 3 with my dad (ironic that it is also showing in Kosovo) before have a final meal and shuttling off to the airport the next morning to take 2 days in returning to Pristina. While having to do the painful 7 hour layover in DC, a dear friend relieved my boredom by picking me up at the airport so we could go to a lake close-by and enjoy the sunny day and then get a nice meal before I had to endure 11 more hours of flying. At least I was able to watch both The Last King of Scotland and In Pursuit of Happiness. Problem was that yet again I did not sleep. As I wandered around Gatwick airport in a daze having just sped my way from Heathrow on a bus, I happened to bump into my program manager from Kosovo so she and I were able to pass my idle time chatting and sharing a ride from the airport back to our apartments in good ole Kosovo. At least it is warm here with all the fields in full green, harvests starting to mature, and the sense of just a little less pollution and trash about. Yes, my batteries felt recharged and I was prepared to put on my clean lenses to make the most out of my time here helping those I could I enjoying myself while at it.

And it started this off with a bang jumping right back into teaching yoga, playing frisbee, attending language class and visiting with all my new friends late night to catch up on what seemed to be an experience already long long ago.